Lacey (Open Wound)
"YEESH, finally! Schomething with ARMSH!"
Bioform: Injurite
Native zone: N/A
Residence: The Hospital, The Abyss, Plank Maze (simultaneously)
Occupation: Patient
Likes: Cats, apparently. A lot.
Dislikes: Salt, lemon juice
An impossible wound that never stops talking. Likes cats.


Open Wound is exactly what her name says, an open wound. Her true name is Lacey. The opening seems to go on forever, going through whatever it is standing on. Talking is performed by smacking like a "wet, sloppy mouth". She slurs "S's" into "Sh's" when doing so. Lacey also likes talking too much, especially about her cats. She actually is a living zonal breach, with multiple instances of her in different places. She was been present in the Hospital, Plank Maze and The Abyss. Entering her opening leads directly to her endozone which is made entirely of congealed blood. This place also acts as a hub from where you can exit from any of her other openings. Her immunity system is represented by Macrobobby, an overactive white cell that may be the cause of her allergies.

Lacey really loves cats, even more than her boyfriend. Tragically, Lacey suffers escalating feline allergies, which got her in the Hospital. Despite the doctors diagnoses, she keeps returning to her cats. This is very dangerous, as continued exposure could lead eventually to a sneeze so powerful that it will damage the wound's core.

She doesn't fear physical harm, as she already is a wound, so she can't be wounded.

List of cats she owns:

  • Samson (Siamese cat, knows half his alphabet already)
  • Mittens (Siamese cat)
  • Samantha (Siamese cat)
  • Tootsie (had seventy four and a half kittens)
  • Fleckle (Tootsie's first kitten, named after Lacey's mother because he's mottled black and purple)
  • Tibbles (second kitten, and both her tails are red paisley)
  • Sassafras (third kitten, Siamese cat)
  • Gertrude (fourth kitten, horizontally inverted with transparent patches)
  • Scleppy (speckled male with detached paws)
  • Kwamp (the roundest)
  • Virginia (has four white socks on her feet and sixteen exomandibles)
  • Tiddo (Virginia's identical sister except she's a late jointinator not having joints yet, she stays on a plank with wheels and pushes herself around with her exhaust)
  • Adam (a hairless long-eye, Lacey rolled the eyes up under his trimouth so the eyes wouldn't get tangled in the curtains)
  • Horace (didn't come out the right way, what he lacks in feline anatomy he makes up in photosynthesis)
  • Sally (the tortoiseshell that spends most of her layers retracted but comes out when smells purple, her favorite)
  • Loafus (most spherical of the siblings)
  • Clobbus (most antispherical of the siblings)
  • Gertie (makes Loafus and Clobbus get along by linking their sockets)
  • Aurelia (the long haired hairless and likes to stay encysted in her older brother, Fibula)
  • Fibula (has Aurelia encysted in him)
  • Spiny (the inverse side of her sister, Tina, and sometimes doesn't want to invert until she had a foam bath)
  • Tina (the inverse side of her sister, Spiny, and hates foam baths)
  • Zermillion (already on her fifth head and doesn't let them recycled by hiding them)
  • Waffles (got his name because he was born waffles but he concept-o-corrected by the time he was done nursing)
  • the four green-line shiverers (refused to be named until they stop sharing a vessel)
  • Princess Crabbo (exploded when she realized what a table really was but the vet sponged her up, now being in a spongeform)
  • Thomas (not happy because it was his favorite sponge that was used for Princess Crabbo)
  • Squamous (the spotted sister we don't talk about)
  • Vischeroy (short-hairlessed haired, she's the most boneless)
  • Karen (luminescent when you think about socket wrenches, has bolt that need to be tighten)
  • Mortimer (gets spooked by light because he associates them with triangles and cats don't get along with triangles)
  • Eve (black-eyed manxs who can only locomote diagonally)
  • Butternut (locomotes only internally)
  • Robin (left his mouth somewhere in the yard but somehow gets plenty of food since he's getting fatter)
  • Artie (can peel himself without any implements but he's pretty bad at putting it back on the right way, which scares his brother Spoop)
  • Spoop (a long hair ragdoll who graduated top of his class in cat-being)
  • Flattycake (a Persian still learning how to manifest dimension, but gets along well with just the two so far)
  • CAT (might not actually be one of the kittens but has CAT written all over her, makes good cheese and leaves a trail of it everywhere she slithers)
  • Slither (little half-spotted rex, slithering is her favorite thing to do even when wearing all her legs)
  • Sinbad (likes sleeping underwater)
  • Loretta (like sleeping overwater)
  • Cardboard (likes sleeping sidewater)
  • Weebo (comprised of 13% mercury and can only count backwards)
  • Pungus (got in the habit of shedding everything but her hair and only has hair left)
  • Footwarp (plays bass in an experimental thrash band with a couple of redworms she met in a sewer)
  • Arpdiller (semiarboreal upside-downius with an alphabetized ham collection)
  • Gorp'n (not allowed out since she ran over a truck)
  • Skelly (trade her eyes for wings but has difficulty navigating through gelatin)
  • Fishwimp (is anti-striped and always caught on corners)
  • Cauliflower (only exists in half-orange light)
  • Snowplow (lost her biovessel and became only soundwaves)
  • Potassium (her skin fell off)
  • Mister Bwoap (a male tuxedo and might be planning to molt into a skwale trenchcoat next)
  • Double Giblets (invented a numerical flavor but doesn't seem to understand the patent office)
  • Not Mister Bwoap (the one that's not Mister Bwoap)
  • Unk (wasn't originally a cat but accidentally got born)
  • Stoppit (can spin around 99 layers per nanospiral, currently drilling a hole through a planet in the grey zone)
  • Lobster (ate an entire weffler and liquified unilaterally, has a white spot on his forehead)
  • Potatobird (made out of old magazines right now and got a little hoggy after her silverfish bath)
  • Two Spoons (likes to go door to door juggling her hearts, the hearts might not enjoy being tossed like that)
  • Half Circle (trades color schemes with other cats and gets hard to tell apart from Number W)
  • Number W (trades color schemes with other cats and gets hard to tell apart from Half Circle)
  • -------- (sold her name for some cheese crackers even if they grow on trees)
  • Krehh''tll (is a throbbing fafflenebber with blue specks and likes to swipe booth from flefferpedes)
  • Vegetable Salty (got her name because she came out writing a novelette about a whale that's mad all the time)
  • T-Shirt Man (rides a green motorbike)
  • Thrubble (gets smaller when she thinks too hard about dirt)
  • Rockets (can only sing about the wrong weather)
  • Huey, Louie and Meanuloid (the red triplets)
  • Blunket (was born a short film about carbohydrates)
  • 1,1,1,1 (named for her number of vertebrae)
  • Nerf (is a foam rubber silicon-hair toadeye)
  • No-head Jimmy Jim Jangles (leaves little blue paw prints all over the definition of pudding)
  • Half of Mark

First AppearanceEdit

In Awful Hospital, taking Nobody Nose's former room after his death.


  • Her name is a pun on laceration.
  • It isn't advised to define pudding until the blue paw prints left by No-head Jimmy Jim Jangles on the definition of pudding is washed off.
  • Her room lacks hidden Parliament devices, probably because they don't want to listen to all her chatter.
  • The idea of sentient wounds began as another Hospital enemy concept.